an overview of LMS

After the weeks of LMS lessons, i have indeed learnt alot and benfitted from all the teachings in Life Mangement Skills. I have to admit though, LMS classes aren't always a bed of roses, there are parts where the lessons get abit dry with all those terms. Nevertheless, i feel that LMS is still enjoyable and it's a really practical module as i am able to apply what i have learnt, like managing anger and conflict. All in all, after the ardous journey of learning, application is the most important tool and i'm proud to say that i have applied what i learnt in my LMS class :)


knowing myself


As i remember vaugely, the first lesson was about self-esteem and self-awareness. Basically, this lesson taught me to understand myself at a greater depth. Often, we always claim that we understand ourselves better than what anyone else could. Well, it can be true but how often do we really reflect over our mistakes to allow us to learn and grow from it, to understand ourselves better? Also, i have learnt what my personality exactly is from the Johari window. From my personality, i understand why am i able to open up to others while some can't. In a way, it helps me to be more sensitive to other's feelings because a person's personality leads to their emotions and feelings. Not only have i learnt about self-awareness, i have also learnt about a person's self-esteem. A person's self-esteem is equally important as well as it builds up their confidence level and it helps the person to achieve a greater height.
afterall, before i allow others to know me, i should understand myself first :)



Time and Priority Management

With 24 hours a day, it still seems little to many of us as we often face tremendous work load. I often complain of having insufficient time to complete my work and that i have so many other things to do like shopping, tutorials, other projects. And due to the fact i'm unable to finish my work, i will get frustrated and throw my temper. In this lesson of time and priority, i was taught how to manage my time and priorities right. For example i learnt how to set my priorities right and how to utilise my 24 hours (minus sleeping hours) properly. From this lesson it gave me an insight that at times, it isn't having a large workload just that i myself procrastinate too much and ended up piling all the work. Frankly speaking, i still do not have the habit yet to construct an activity log but nevertheless, i am still able to mentally sort out what should come before what and etc. In addition, by setting specific goals to what i'm doing helps alot as i feel that certain drive to complete my work and that satisfaction i have completed it!

Also, it isn't all that an easy feat to be able to identify the obstacles to the completion of tasks.

At times, i feel i might even overlook that a certain thing is an obstacle which would hinder my progress, but oh well, "no pain, no gain" :)



Managing Anger

Anger is defined as natural emotional response to perceived frustration, threats, disappointments, and stress. It is natural and not foreign to all of us. Instead, it is somewhat familiar to us as anger resides in us all.

Especially for me, as i am more of a straight-forward person, whatever i'm unhappy with or whatever i'm angry about i would just show out my displeasure through mincing words, cold muderous stares or even resort to pulling punches. This is to vent my anger and my frustration on that particular someone.

Fortunately, im not short tempered and neither will i get angry over peanuts, hence, my anger is somewhat under control for fear of it blaring out loud.

What's useful to me about managing anger i have learnt is that it taught me again about the triggers to anger. Although even the noblest could not get rid of anger, at least after learning managing anger, i am more able to know what triggered me to be angry. At times it would be entirely due to cognitive distortions which lead to my outburst. For example i might be thinking, "She must have been super angry with me and now, shes so gonna tell others how wicked i m and etc". This thinking would add fuel to fire and drive me to a higher level of anger and resentment.

As there are people with difference in their characters and personality, all i could do from now on is to apply how to cool down and not resort to cognitive distortions to further fuel my anger. Hence, whenever i feel like slapping that someone or soclding that someone, i would take a step back to cool myself down. Afterall, in some cases, because of anger, it led to a situation far worse than what it already is.

Managing anger is important as is helps me to cool down and think before i act. Afterall, who doesn't want to live life happily. If i were to choose, i would rather choose to cool down and smile at the end of the day rather than to get rash-headed and still angry at the end of the day :)



Understanding You and Me

To understand each other, the most important tool would be communication and to communicate, we should listen to each other. We often hear this "can you listen to me? im talking to you". This is an example of ineffective listening which would often result in miscommunication and then lead to disagreements ad quarrels. Effective listening helps both parties as it often beings them closer to one another. By just silently listening to another's woes or happiness, we could often tell what character this person has. Of course, by providing that listening ear to our friends give them the message that they are not alone and that they have people behind supporting whatever they have done.

I feel that, when a person is willing to share his/her sorrows with you, it means alot. And also, i feel that once someone opens up to you, the person doesn't requires much comments, the person just needs someone there to confide in, someone there to listen to his/her burdens.

Don't be taken aback when just by being a simple listening ear, it helps a person alot more than what you can imagine,



Managing Conflict
Conflicts are all part and parcel of life, it is inevitable and natural. I believe that nobody lives in this world without having any form of conflict. Well, before i stepped into the class for managing conflict, i deem conflict as "quarrels", just any form of "quarrels". After the class, i have learnt that there are various forms of conflicts such as Workplace conflict, Relationship conflict, Structural conflicts, Inter-racial conflict, Data conflicts, Interest-based conflicts, Value-based conflicts and etc. From Managing Conflict, i have been exposed to the fact that conflicts might not necessarily be bad. It sounds contradictive but conflicts do help to strengthen bonds and relationships between the conflicting parties. In a way, both parties would get to understand each other better and history would not repeat itself again. Also, conflicts promote gorup cohesion and conflicts promotes creativity. It sounded all strange to me in the first place as to how can conflicts ever be good? But after reading on, i withdrew my earlier thought.

basically, there are five conflict management style, - the turtle, the shark, the teddy bear, the fox and the owl. It sounds wierd but actually it isn't. All the animals are just names to represent each different management style. Bascially, i see myself more of a teddy bear and owl. At times, i do feel lyke having a conflict as i would get to know how much i mean to that person yet i still value the relationship alot. I'm willing to collaborate at times and accomodate at times. I know that at times it is tough to achieve the win-win situation of a conflict but i would try to get the best out of the both worlds. In a way, it would benefit both parties from all the hustle and bustle which occured.



Managing Fear

Everyone has their own little dirty secret about fear that even someone very close to us may not know. Fear. A simple yet powerful word. Fear of heights, Fear of animals, Fear of pain etc etc etc. There is just so many fear residing in this world. In this lesson i have learnt of a way to overcome my fear. In a way, fear is just an obstacle in our life, a hurdle to get through. Once we have gotten through it, it doesn't seem as scary as before. Like once i have a fear for something, i would write it down somewhere, then i would continue with the reasons why i am fearful of it, followed by how would i overcome the fear. This step by step procedure do help me to overcome certain fears as i know why am i afraid of it. Although it requires a long period of time to get over the fear, it is still helpful to me to get rid of the fear slowly. :)



In conlcusion, over the past few weeks in LMS class, i have learnt alot of practical and useful life skills. Not to mention, i have found several great friends as well. In addition, in LMS, it really taught me to look deeper into myself, to understand myself better, to really get to know in a given situation, what should i do. Like when i get angry or i meet with a conflict, i would just walk away, take a deep breath and slowly manage my anger, conflicts, fear and also slowly listen to others and to set my time and priorities right.

It might seem boring to others about why are we learning all these, but trust me, it is a lesson of a lifetime. I have learnt many useful applications which i believe have benefitted me greatly in my personal or work life :)